This was sent to me by my friend!

 Suffering 

The one constant that we can all count on in life is suffering. The death of a dear one, a divorce, betrayal(s) by someone you trusted, a bad medical diagnosis, job loss, news of infertility, long-term physical pain, etc.

The result of suffering is that it forces you to look into the abyss, to know that really bad things happen to people for no apparent reason.  What you believe to be true is no longer valid. The way you thought that your life would go is no longer possible. Deeply, you are no longer the same person because if this can happen what else can happen and how can you deal with it?  The luxury of being naive is no longer an option.

At the height of suffering, living becomes moment-by-moment. Just get through the next minute, hour, day and eventually longer amounts of time. It isn't very good. At this time, it is enough to endure.

Suffering also involves deep loneliness because who can truly understand your agony?

True recovery from suffering involves formulating a new construct of the world and who you are. You go forward either with bitterness and resentment and use anything to self-medicate as you pretend to be OK or dig deep to find the meaning within the suffering in your life.

I have hit this point many times in my life. I have been broken and on my knees screaming quietly one word "Help!" As I cried out my agony to God, I felt a calming presence, sometimes a small voice inside comforting me with words that I did not have. I found my God. I also found Jesus. He knew exactly what I was experiencing because He had suffered being whipped and beaten, betrayed by His friend, His people asking for His death that He of all people did not deserve and then a painful agonizing death. He understood my agony.

I have slowly rebuilt my life and found my way out of the agony many times by learning who I am. I was created before the world began by God. He chose me to come to faith and brought it about through my suffering. He promised a lifetime of purposeful work that only I could accomplish for Him. He is always at my side and always revealing more of His love as I choose to seek it.

I also learned that I can do more than endure in these times. I have great peace now as I hit more crevices in the road. What was agony has become another invitation to experience God in ways I could never have foreseen.

A.    Eller March 2024